A Word that Is NOT a Part of my Vocabulary

TAlk to yourself the way you would talk to your bffLoser. The word makes me cringe. And not because it denotes the idea of losing something, whether it be the big game or at life in general. No, I hate the word because it attacks my identity. It cuts to the quick of who I am.

Merriam-Webster says that a loser is, “A person who is incompetent or unable to succeed; something doomed to fail or disappoint.” WOW. That’s just sad. Even the dictionary attaches an I.D. tag to this hopeless word.

You can’t separate the word LOSER from a person. And once it’s assigned, that person is doomed to see herself that way as well. Instead of ascribing the act of losing to an event or occurrence, we put the heavy weight of this title on a human being. 

A person who identifies with the LOSER title doesn’t see herself with the ability to overcome the odds. She doesn’t take on tasks that seem daunting because she fears the possibility of failure.

A person who has come to accept herself as a LOSER doesn’t like the idea of trying new things. She plays it safe in all areas of her life because the idea of leaving her comfort zone presents the opportunity to mess up.

But, these LOSER characteristics are first put on us by other people. Because we failed a grade. Or maybe we got up on stage to deliver a speech and we mumbled and stuttered all the way through it. Because our marriage didn’t last. Or we can’t seem to get past this addiction.

Someone else told us this is who we are and we believed them. This is why I hate this word with every fiber of my being. LOSER denotes an unwillingness to try to be anything else. A person who identifies with this hurtful word has no hope. And the Bible says that, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick…” (Proverbs 13:12)

So, I refuse to say it in my house. I refuse to allow my children to say it to eachother or themselves. If I hear it come out of their mouths, a big ol’ mama bear roars that THIS IS NEVER WHO THEY ARE. No matter how many times they fail.

Losing at something is just a lesson in overcoming. It’s an opportunity to do better the next time. It is never supposed to be a name that you get comfortable with. You’re a winner. We all are. 

Ya know why? God made us in His image. That means you were born to win. Quit calling yourself a LOSER, k? Or I just might have to come over there and roar loudly in your direction! 😉

What about you? What’s a word that you absolutely hate? Comment below and let me know.


Some of us blogging buddies are committed to writing more weekly on our blogs! We have a variety of topics we’ll be writing about! To check out these awesome chicks and where their writing is taking them, click on their blog links below!

Aimme at mamacentric.com
Abbie at grumblinggrace.com
Emily at emilyfisk.com
Gloryanna at onlyaseason.com 

The Mom She Needs


Happy Tuesday, friends! I am over on Her View From Home again today with a piece about postpartum depression. I share my story of dealing with it for a little while after my first daughter’s birth. I hope you will take a peek into my life for a minute and read about my experience. Many moms struggle with this and I want to be a voice of freedom for them to also share their very personal experiences. Life (and all of it’s moments) is meant to be shared, right? Thank you for checking it out HERE.

Here’s a sneak peek:

She came home. Only to scream ugly comments to me that poke at the very identity of who I am. She said she wished I was never her mother. Doesn’t she know? I ache every single day because I AM her mother. The truth that she is a gift that I barely received is something I carry with me everywhere I go. It is a part of who I am.


To read more, click here! For more Her View From Home posts, click on the HVFH category in the drop down menu. I generally write about motherhood, faith, and grief along with other amazing mommy writers. Thanks!