Brokenness is not a bad thing. In fact, it’s the only way to true intimacy with God. And intimacy with God is the only thing that brings everlasting joy despite the brokenness. So one is dependent on the other it would seem.
Being broken before the Lord simply means that you are honest about your sin and shame. Unabashedly honest. Not out of fear that God is mad at you (cause He’s not). Not to check it off your list that you said, “I’m sorry” (cause that’s not really an apology). Not to get Him to pat you on the back (cause He won’t).
Admitting your humanity to our perfect God is simply the way to keep yourself humble. God isn’t looking for your perfection.He just wants you to willingly admit when you mess up out of an overwhelming desire to please your loving Father.
Because He is love, after all. He is the only One that can meet all your needs and satisfy your deepest longings. But to really know Him, to really see Him in His goodness, means you have to let go of your expectations. Because He isn’t confined to what you can think up. In fact, anything you and I could think up wouldn’t even come near to what He can do.
I want to live in a state of brokenness. In a place of perpetual laying-down-of-my-will so that God, in all His amazing glory, can have His way in me. So that I can never know what it feels like to be on my own. The thought of living in this world without Him is terrifying.
Imagine hurting your best friend and then never saying I’m sorry. Instead, you just pretend like things are normal and you never bring it up. Water under the bridge. But is it really? Or will the pain that you caused your friend haunt you until you own up to it and ask for forgiveness? It’s not that your friend won’t love you anymore if you choose not to fess up. He just wants to know that you love him enough to make things right. That’s all God asks of us. That, my friends, is brokenness.
So as we end this year, I am taking my broken pieces of pain, regret, discouragement, un-forgiveness, and anger to the only One that can put me back together. And I can’t wait to see the mosaic masterpiece that His love creates from my shattered mess.